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Top 10 tricks to piss off your webmaster.

I've been a web designer for quite a long time now, so I can assure you that these are the best tricks to piss off your webmaster, and possibly end up with a voodoo doll of yourself on a geek's desk.

Any similarity with real people/events is purely coincidental and no-one should feel targeted, I've made this list solely for fun.

So here it is (in no particular order):

  1. Pre-reserve your domain and hosting with a small and obscure foreign web based company.

  2. Assume that those who made your website also inherited the technical support for your emails.

  3. Send all your texts on plain old paper, but not handwritten. It's important that the guy who has to retype them knows that there is a digital version somewhere.

  4. When the webmaster ask for your logo, give him an old business card that was in your wallet for the last 3 years.

  5. When he ask "what you would like to be able to change by yourself in your website", answer "everything!". And when the site is done, send him your stuff instead of changing it yourself.

  6. Ask him a for "plug & play" quotation, Ex.: "I'd like a quotation of the site with and without a shopping cart, with and without the gallery .." and so on for every single part of your site.

  7. Send him drafts, let him integrate them, then send some corrections.. iterate over and over until he collapse crying in a corner of the room.

  8. Although you don't know anything about the web (and proclaim it), insist that the web designers do the site exactly like you want it instead of what they think would be best for you.

  9. During the initial meeting, brag that you will write all the needed texts over night and send them back the next morning. Then give no sign of life for the next 3 month and call back asking "Is my site done yet ?!"

  10. Tell him you need a Youtube like website but with Facebook functionalities and the simplicity of Google. Of course you have a very limited budget and the quotation must be on your desk for the next morning.

Bonus: When you receive your quotation argue that your nephew can do it for a fraction of the price in his basement.


Reposted fromwandi wandi viagiania giania

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